Relationships101Podcast

INVEST IN LOVE: Unlocking the Secrets of Relationship Success!

• Sylvester & Jasmeka Wilson • Season 1 • Episode 29

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Ever wondered if picking the right partner is akin to picking the best stock? Join us, Sylvester and JasMeka Wilson, as we draw unexpected parallels in Relationships 101 between the art of investing and the nuances of nurturing meaningful relationships. We promise you'll uncover strategies for choosing partners just as wisely as you would select a stock, focusing on key fundamentals like compatibility, shared values, and long-term potential. It's time to rethink attraction and learn how digging deeper into a person’s true character can lead to stronger, more fulfilling connections.

Picture this: ignoring red flags in a relationship due to FOMO might be just as disastrous as holding onto a failing stock. Through candid discussions, we explore the concept of "stop loss" and how it applies both to investments and relationships. As we share insights on maintaining commitment and actively investing in the partnership, you'll discover how divine timing and informed choices pave the way for lasting success. Let's talk about the balance between individual growth and the strength of a relationship, drawing from our experiences to enrich both aspects of your life.

Just as a savvy investor keeps an eye on market trends, nurturing a relationship means regular check-ins and quality time. You'll learn why setting boundaries is crucial in preventing emotional losses and preserving the health of your relationship. Risk management isn't just for financial portfolios; it's essential for resolving conflicts and avoiding toxic dynamics. By the end of this episode, you'll see the importance of investing wisely in both your relationships and personal growth, ensuring mutual benefits and genuine fulfillment. So, tune in and transform your approach to relationships with insights that blend love and logic.

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SYLVESTER:

Welcome to Relationships 101 Podcast, where we share experiences to help newlyweds and aspiring newlyweds understand the importance of a healthy relationship so that they can thrive in this world called married life. Welcome, welcome, welcome. This is Relationships 101 Podcast, your introduction to a happy, healthy relationship. I'm your host, sylvester Wilson.

JASMEKA:

And I'm your co-host, your mama Wilson. I'm just playing. I am just playing Chimes Mika Wilson. Come get her playing. I am just playing Chimes Miko Wilson.

SYLVESTER:

Come get her, please Come get her.

JASMEKA:

You don't want nobody to come get me? Don't say that.

SYLVESTER:

Come get her y'all.

JASMEKA:

Don't say that.

SYLVESTER:

Please Now. Choosing a good stock alone will not get you rich unless you invest, and just like in relationships, choosing a good partner alone will not get you a happy, healthy relationship. You got to invest.

JASMEKA:

I'm glad you finished that sentence because I thought you was about to start teaching the people how to trade stocks.

SYLVESTER:

No, I ain't trapping.

JASMEKA:

But listen y'all, we are back. In one of our previous episodes we talked about how you can apply business principles to a relationship and we know that the time that we're living in our generation, we're focusing heavily on how to grow our money, how to do this, but we want to make sure in growing our money we're also growing in relationship. So this week podcast we're going to correlate it to trading, because we know we got some traders out there and we ain't talking about them traders in relationship, Not cheaters.

JASMEKA:

Not cheaters, not trading your girl out because you not that type of trader, but you know the stock investment world. So today we're just going to apply to a relationship, we're going to flip it so, but you want to start them off on like because you know before you invest they'd be like oh you got to do your research on these companies you're investing in. You can't just, you can't just pick a company and invest in it. Or you can't just pick a company because the news telling you about it, because then it's too late.

SYLVESTER:

Right.

SYLVESTER:

So like what is that first step relationally, Just like with stocks, you got to know how to select a good stock.

SYLVESTER:

You got to know how to select a good stock and I'm going to take I'm going to take it from how they tell you, like when you select the stock, that they got to be something.

SYLVESTER:

That that is. I wrote down some notes. They say that you have to select stocks that that from companies that are good, that have good fundamentals, strong relationships, strong leadership, strong relationships, strong leadership things that are companies that have a proven track record, growth potential and align with their, with your values and goals, Sounds like picking a partner to me. You know, because, in the same way you got to choose partners that that require, you know you have to evaluate, be able to evaluate the character when you're looking for somebody. You got to be able to evaluate what they stand for and be able to see what shared values you guys might have in common, the compatibility rate. You got to be able to a great partnership actually have qualities that align with what you envision in a long-term relationship, and if that ain't lining up, then that ain't something that you should be trying to invest in.

JASMEKA:

That's what you just said. Remind me of when I caught myself trading Tesla. So I'm not, I don't like stocks that move real big and fast. So if Elon get on there and say tomorrow I'm going wherever or I'm building this, it'll just shoot up overnight $30, $40. But it didn't fit to me. So just relationally, where, if this person like I don't know, if you move a particular way that just don't fit to my personality or where I'm headed, I think we need to be cautious. Of what type of person do I need? What type of person can I handle?

SYLVESTER:

Right, they might be moving too fast.

JASMEKA:

Might be moving too fast. You know what I'm saying.

SYLVESTER:

Or might be moving too slow for you, yeah.

JASMEKA:

Right.

SYLVESTER:

So it depends on what you're looking for out of life, like how fast you looking to move Right, how slow you looking to move. Hold on now, daddy, you're going too fast. Now Hold on Right and them financials.

JASMEKA:

Listen, because I love love but I can't cash love in at FPNL.

SYLVESTER:

We got questions y'all Are you married to your best friend?

JASMEKA:

Are you married to your business partner? If so, head on over to Relationships101Podcastcom. We'll drop the link down in the description.

SYLVESTER:

Well, you can go ahead and pick up a shirt for you and pick up a shirt for her.

JASMEKA:

Nah fella, you know the ladies like to shop. You can pick up a shirt for you and pick up a shirt for him.

SYLVESTER:

And both of y'all can rep that grind and that hustle that y'all do every day.

JASMEKA:

Every day. I can't be like FNL, take this love credit. That's all he got to pay these bills. It's a little bank. I can make some deposits, but I can't cash that in to pay these bills.

SYLVESTER:

So the financials may look a little shaky, and you got to know that may look a little shaky and you got to know that. But first before we even get to financials, because that right there is kind of like talking about like a deeper dive into the quotes, Because I can't ask what, if I asked you for your financials on our first date, what you would have felt?

JASMEKA:

I ain't saying shit or gold nigga Right Regime as a little bro, you know what.

SYLVESTER:

I'm saying yeah, with a bro. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, definitely, definitely, because, um, I think we we talked about this type of thing on on a previous um episode we had I think it was lovers and friends, maybe the lovers and friends episode, I think what we just talked about. I think we went over like questions you should be asking on the date okay, um, I don't remember the title yeah, me, neither.

SYLVESTER:

Me, neither, um, but there's certain questions that you're going to be asking on a date first date, second date, third date, third date and certain questions that are going to automatically get answered right at the introduction of the person. So, on that face value, that top level, you're looking at a physical. You see, oh, this is my type. There's somebody who, yeah.

SYLVESTER:

I'm sorry so you get to see their personality, you know whether they're funny you know what I'm saying, whether you consider them to be cool and calm and collected and that's sexy to you, or whatever the case is. It's certain things like on surface level that you can tell, kind of like with a stalk, where it may align with your, with your day to day lifestyle.

JASMEKA:

Right.

SYLVESTER:

And because what they teach in stock or trading stocks is that you know, starting off, before you even get into like doing research on a company, just you know, think about what are you actually using in your day-to-day life. If you're somebody who shop at Publix versus shopping at Walmart, then you probably should be investing in Walmart I mean in Publix.

JASMEKA:

Or if you got every Apple device that come out Right and you want it all, then go ahead and invest in Apple.

SYLVESTER:

You're an Apple user, right? So those are fundamentals, those are like surface level things. But then you might go that way with an investment and then find out that it's not a good thing once you go to digging you know I'm saying into a little bit more like their financials and and digging into loss, yeah, and digging into that history and what kind of losses they may have had in this particular quarter of doing business and how high their sales or low their sales are in a particular quarter. So those things are a little deeper dive. And what I kind of, and what that means, is when you meet a person, that top level I mean that face value stuff that you can just see off back what you like, cool.

SYLVESTER:

But then when you start dating them and courting this person, now it's time to kind of dig a little deeper. You know what I'm saying. Now you're finding out the financials and how they handle their money, because you get to ask them more questions. You get to ask them more questions. Temperament, yeah, yeah. Do they have a temper problem? Temper problem like what's their living situation and do they have any children, any baby mamas or baby daddies going on. Have they been married before? These are things like what's their beliefs and see if that aligns with something that you're looking for in the long term. It's just like pick and stop.

JASMEKA:

Pick and stop. Pick and stop, it's easy like picking stuff Picking stuff picking stuff. You know what I'm saying? It's easy said than done.

SYLVESTER:

Definitely why.

JASMEKA:

I say that is because your girl done picked some stocks and stayed in it hoping, ooh, wishing. I don't know how many penny stock traders out there I don't play with them. That's wishing upon a whale. I'd rather go throw a penny in a whale, but some people are fortunate in it. I've just never been fortunate in it. So I just wonder how many people despise relationships because they never put that stop loss in place, just like how many people traded in the stock market lost money because they never put stop loss when it hit this target, when it hit this target, when it hit this trigger or when it basically, it's a boundary that you set up.

SYLVESTER:

You get out and you say hey look, if this stock go below ten dollars, ten dollars once it hit this mark right here, it's gonna automatically close out and buy.

JASMEKA:

Yeah, so I think some people are probably traumatized from relationships that they've been in in the past, but they never put a stop loss and they just kept trying and trying and wishing and wishing.

SYLVESTER:

Or maybe they put a stop loss but they ignored it. That's that red flag, right. Stop loss can be like a red flag, like I put this boundary up and they crossed it, but I let it slide because maybe I got FOMO fear of missing out. Maybe I got FOMO. Maybe I got fear missing out because all my friends and relationships right now um, I feel like my biological clock is ticking dang why I still ain't married yet, or whatever the case is, I got FOMO. So when it hit my stop loss and I seen where dang this may not be a good investment, it done crossed the boundary. It done crossed some levels that I always said I would never cross, right, but I still stuck with it because I'm in a little season of desperation. It's that FOMO, fear of missing out, and we got to check that at the door Because your time is coming, regardless. There's somebody there for you. You just got to hold on to and stick to what your stop loss is, because you're going to end up losing everything.

JASMEKA:

When it comes to FOMO, I would say it's a matter you lacking trust or confidence in yourself, or just the timing, like you feel like, oh, this is going to be the trade or this is going to be a relationship that take me to the next level, and it actually ended up being a bad investment because it just it wasn't it. Like I've been a victim of fear, missing out, and then later regretted that crap, like dang, I shouldn't have got in there, that I knew I wasn't supposed to get in it. But I will say in this season we really got to go back to our foundation. Like we got to trust god, like whoever you got for me, lord, send them. Like we really have to get in that place if we think we're going to.

SYLVESTER:

You know, excel in relationships and be happy, get to that place where we trust in that person we got real excited bae.

JASMEKA:

So once you found a good stock, right.

SYLVESTER:

Yeah. You didn't got to invest in it right, you got to invest in it.

JASMEKA:

So you done, did your research. You feel like this, the one you called to this person, you feel like it's going to be the trade. This company is good. Now you have to invest in it. Okay, you're not going to make the money just saying Apple, cute, apple, went up $5 a day. Right, you're sitting on the sideline.

SYLVESTER:

Oh, I love the logo. I just love the logo. It's so cute.

JASMEKA:

Yes, you got to invest in it. Yeah, so tell me that applies to a relationship, nurturing a relationship, investing in a relationship? What are some things we can do?

SYLVESTER:

All right. So as far as stock market insight, I wrote down some things that kind of like help me with stock market. I ain't no stock market guru or nothing. You know what I'm saying, so I had to do my own research.

JASMEKA:

But you're a relationship one because, baby, you're going on 15 years.

SYLVESTER:

Yes, ma'am, yes, ma'am. So, in regards to stock market, investors, don't just buy once and forget. They track their investments, they monitor performance and they adjust strategies when it's needed. Ok, they adjust their strategies when it's needed. In regards to relationships, nurturing a relationship requires continuous physical investment to thrive. You got to make consistent deposits into that emotional bank account of a relationship. There's practical ways to reinvest in a relationship to see it grow, and that's with quality time, communication, acts of service, getting in touch with those five love languages. That does a lot for you. If you don't know about the five love languages, y'all gonna look that up.

JASMEKA:

There's another episode on that too. Yeah, we do got an episode on five love languages, okay.

SYLVESTER:

We've been talking y'all.

JASMEKA:

Y'all Go down and watch some of that stuff. Watch our growing beginnings, because some of that stuff it was like girl shut up. I mean we always get value.

SYLVESTER:

We just learned along the way on certain things. So, like I say, there's practical ways to invest in a relationship and it should be with time, you know again, knowing what your partner needs, uh is investing in that. What is quality time? Do we need to be etching out time and space to make sure that we, uh, that we growing intimately together?

SYLVESTER:

right are we uh? Are we are we doing uh check monitoring your relationship performance? You know what I'm saying. What's the regular check-ins looking like? You know, because we got to monitor. See where we at. Is it performing well?

JASMEKA:

I want to look when we're trading traders. We're looking at their phone, we're watching if the stock went in the opposite direction. We watching if the stock went in the opposite direction. We need to apply those same strategies to our relationship that when we going in for it to go up, when we see it's making a turn, how far down it's going, like checking to hey bae, you all right, am I doing something wrong? Do you need something more of me?

SYLVESTER:

Like we can sense when the atmosphere is changing. If you, if you paying attention because nobody don't like you say if you, if you're, if you are an investor, you know not to invest in a stock and then never look at it again, never check on it, never, never check what's going on with it. Um, and and did I say this before, I don't know News is very important. When you select in a stock, or when you're in a stock or you actually invest in it, the news it might, some bad news might come out about the stock and or about the company, and then the stock, the value, goes down. You know what I'm saying, and so what that says to me is that in a relationship, especially in a part of the relationship, when you're actually selecting this person, seeing if they align with you, you want to make sure that. Check the news, ask around.

JASMEKA:

Ask people, no, ask people.

SYLVESTER:

I'm talking about. When you're in that stage of actually getting to know people and dating and seeing this person aligns with your values and what you're looking for in a long-term relationship, then go ahead and just like what we do with stock check the news, ask around.

JASMEKA:

But some people don't want to ask because it's like if they say like say, you trusted somebody to be a good judge of who you be with and you went to that person, and they say, no, some people don't want to seek wise counsel on should I do this?

SYLVESTER:

But that's only when they know that it's some red flags.

JASMEKA:

So they're just trying to cop out.

SYLVESTER:

That's it, that's it, that's it. We know our friend is going to hold. We know our friend is going to hold fast to what our standards are Right. Especially, we share the same standards. So we don't want to go to our friend and say, hey, you heard of Ricky before what? Yeah, I met this dude. He said he work at such and such and such and his name ricky, and he drive us such and such and such.

JASMEKA:

And you gotta ask these questions before you get into something so you can know what you're getting into well then at that point they just gonna have to take the l and they can't move on to reaping the benefits. Hopefully it'll work out good, because sometimes our judgment is wrong.

SYLVESTER:

Or it just may not be the right time, Just like with stock, when that bad news is out you don't want to invest at that particular time. That's what that means. You don't want to invest at that particular time. You want to wait until that air out, that fan out. Maybe he going through something with his baby mom, maybe she having baby daddy drama right now it might be too soon, you know what I'm saying. You might want to just pull back a little bit and wait until that thing gets straightened out.

JASMEKA:

Right To stop be going down and some of us be like, oh, let me catch it yo. Two dollars, you're one. Stop ain't gonna make that thing correct. It's gonna keep going down to the bottom of where it's supposed to land. So you just wait till it land, wait till it heal, wait till whatever right, wait to wait, wait till he go to anger management yeah, Start seeing some little progressive growth. Yeah, jump in.

JASMEKA:

But I'm watching you because you just came down like a sword. I'm not coming in with this stock for the go to the moon.

SYLVESTER:

Right, because some of us sometimes like these. I like what you said. You say your little one investment into this company is not going to be the investment that make its value rise back up, start going in the opposite direction. And what that says to me is that sometimes we be trying to, we think that we could change people Like, oh yeah, he just ain't met the right person. Yet I'm the one. Change is life and it's like that nigga still got a problem and it's just not you for to have that same problem. Like now, it's going to be your problem. That's the only difference. You ain't changing him. Only he can change him by going and getting the help that he actually need, and that's going to raise value. Right, we raise our own value as individuals. What help do I need? What do I need to invest in in myself and that'll raise my value.

JASMEKA:

And then when somebody connect with me, then they know that they got good stuff so, in order to reap the benefits, reaping the benefits, who like dividends, who like profit? Oh when I pour into this relationship, my desire like I'm not just pouring in and say I got a husband because being single ain't a curse and being married ain't the answer right so it's like what are the benefits of having a husband? Because it's a choice of having to.

JASMEKA:

Yeah, like, so it's just, when we're trading, we're trading for a purpose, we're hoping to have gains. So in these relationships, we're hoping to gain something, to see some profit. Yeah, we want to see some profit. So it's like, in order to see that, we got to invest in it, we got to watch it, we got to buy when it's right, get it when it's watch it. I'm not just saying like, I ain't saying give up on a man or a woman. They may need some counseling or they may need something, but something got to happen, because it ain't just going to happen, right.

SYLVESTER:

It got to be intentional, it got to be intentional.

JASMEKA:

With good stocks, investors receive dividends and profits In relationships. The dividends are emotional rewards you receive from a healthy bond and you get trust, love, companionship, stability. Those are some of the benefits. Like I come home Thankfully, by God's grace, knowing that my husband is coming home, Like I don't really have too much worries in the sense of is he gonna leave me any kids tomorrow? Right, right um just you know, yeah, so, yeah, so I reap and coming home and ain't bringing nothing home oh right.

SYLVESTER:

so that's another, that's another, uh, that's another, uh way to profit. So those are some dividends and some profits Hold on.

JASMEKA:

I ain't going to let you slide with that. Come home and bring your stuff home that I'm going to tie it to the stock market because that's what we're doing. It sounds like bears and bull markets Ups.

SYLVESTER:

Ups and downs, yeah.

JASMEKA:

And that's what happens in the market.

SYLVESTER:

But what you mean? What's a bear market?

JASMEKA:

The bear market is when stuff just ain't going right. It's down. Everything's selling, it's going down. It's going down Bull, everything up, everything up.

SYLVESTER:

Everything is going up. It looks good.

JASMEKA:

So in those times when you said are bringing something home that sound like it's down, that's the bear, that's the bear, that's the bear, we in a down time. But instead of you trying to pour into this, we can't pour in a company and hope that it come up overnight, right, so you can't really tie to that. But relationally, we can work to figure something out. Trading wise I'm sorry, that's a company. That company ain't got nothing to do with me. I'm jumping out or I'm buying puts, I'm just you trading it differently. But in a relationship when we're going through our down seasons, like we have to figure it out, that don't mean step out and give me something or don't come home or say you want a divorce just because we're in this low place. What do we need to do to get out of this low place? When companies have down seasons, they're strategizing, they're looking at those financials, they cutting people. What we need to do in this relationship?

SYLVESTER:

is to get together. What adjustments do we need to make Right what we need to do in this relationship? What adjustments do we need?

JASMEKA:

to make Right.

SYLVESTER:

Yeah, yeah, definitely. And if you're a seasoned, like seasoned investors right, the seasoned investors, the people who are you know, who done been in this thing, and I'm talking about seasoned people, seasoned relationships then you understand that it takes those adjustments you know what I'm saying. You learn how to kind of like ride out those ups and downs, absolutely, how to readjust yourself to those ups and downs.

JASMEKA:

We see the baby. Give me some of that salt.

SYLVESTER:

Yay, because one thing about it is when you've been in this thing for a long time, man, you understand that it's going to happen. It's going to happen. The ups and the downs are going to come, like the man, you understand that it's going to happen. It's going to happen. The ups and the downs are going to come, like the downs are going to come, with the ups, and you just kind of like you learn how to maneuver.

JASMEKA:

It's going to happen. You learn how to maneuver. Listen, we won business partners. That was new to us. Yeah, we were husband, wife, mom, dad Like we had that intact Once we joined and became Relationships 101 podcast. That was something new to us. We went through our down seasons of trying to figure this out, reassessing, like it's just seasons. How do we? How do we trade this market?

SYLVESTER:

What do we need right now, at this time? You may need to add a level of patience into it. You may need to add some uh, you know proper communication. Um, where are we going wrong with this? What's causing this, this season? This, uh, bear market? What's calling this? What's causing the season of this bear market to happen? Um, it may be, uh, some trust issues on that we need to work on. It might be right, right, um, family, but it has to be financed.

SYLVESTER:

Yeah, yeah, yeah I can run it, yeah, run it, okay, okay, exactly, exactly, but but you know, with consistent effort, you know I'm saying that's the only thing that's going to make make the difference, right? Um, consistent effort, um, because those, those with consistent effort, the bull market will return, the bull will return, it will go back up. Just be consistent, man and patient, and just apply those things that you know work.

JASMEKA:

And something I would like to make a comment on is we never panic. Sorry, I talk with my hands a lot but we never panic and soul our just I talk with my hands a lot but we never panic and sold our relationship like some people, just panic and be like I'm done sell it all you can have it just, and then guess what?

JASMEKA:

to stop trade on you and take off, and now you're sick how many sick people out there? Cause you had something that was worth building with and you jumped out. And now you regretting that because that bull done took off.

SYLVESTER:

Yeah.

JASMEKA:

My heart go out for y'all. I'm just saying.

SYLVESTER:

Just saying so. Another thing that helps growth inside of a relationship regarding a stock and relationship right is diversification, and you know sometimes when you buy particular stocks inside of your portfolio.

JASMEKA:

I only buy Apple, all right.

SYLVESTER:

Or I only buy technology stocks Right, or I only buy Apple, or I only buy technology stocks, or I only buy.

JASMEKA:

Wait, so how you trying to diversify me.

SYLVESTER:

Real estate stocks.

JASMEKA:

Let me hear what you about to do at this time how you get diversification. Wait a minute.

SYLVESTER:

Well, we maybe have to bring somebody new up in here. Don't lie, don't fool the people.

JASMEKA:

Don't even fool the people.

SYLVESTER:

Alright, look, look, look, that's not what I'm talking about. So, inside a relationship, though, in order to diversify, sometimes we have to invest in something other than the us, right? Other than the relationship, but let's invest in the individual. I love it, right? Something outside of the relationship. What about your personal growth? How can I invest in your personal growth? And you know, because if you grow as an individual, then that adds value to us. If I'm growing as an individual, it may even be individual interest that I have Things that I'm trying to do outside of our relationship. You know what I'm saying. You're like well, baby, let me drop some money, what you need, right, you need me to grab what you need, and that adds value to me, which, in turn, adds value to us. So that's what I mean by diversification now you talking my language we can diversify.

JASMEKA:

We've been doing it we can diverse we've been doing it we invest in ourself individually, which make us better in a unit. We do not believe in 50 50.

SYLVESTER:

We believe in 100, 100 right it's one account and we put in all of it in yeah, but let's remember this, though not only only are you investing in yourself that's diversification but are you investing in the other person's individual growth, like what are you doing for them? Are you paying, you know? Are you putting you know? Some time into. Right to help them grow as well.

JASMEKA:

I need like a thousand dollars for this thing I'm trying to branch out for the ladies.

SYLVESTER:

Well, you got it. You handle the finances. Anyway, go ahead. I know I couldn't make you laugh Because one thing that we've heard all through the years is you know, we just out, you know I just outgrew them, we outgrew each other, and that's because you was growing. On what? You were growing on.

JASMEKA:

Making her stay home and raise the kids. She wasn't growing. She was being that faithful wife raising the children Right. And now you tired of Mama Sue, because you done fell in love with this high functioning.

SYLVESTER:

Not Mama Sue again Leave.

JASMEKA:

Sue out of this. Sue going to love me, whoever she is.

SYLVESTER:

So or or or. We just was too busy investing in our own individual efforts and our own individual you know what I'm saying things. We was investing in our own individual things I'm turning this way.

SYLVESTER:

Individuals just doing me. You turn that way doing you, and of course we're going to grow apart Because you're growing. But we ain't no togetherness in this at all, not even like if you're growing and it's all about your individual growth. As long as I'm putting in on that, then it's still an us thing. You know what I'm saying Risk management. Risk management. That's what we talk about now.

JASMEKA:

That's what we talk about now. Risk management that's what we talk about now, that's what we talk about now we talk about that Risk management. My trade is no about risk management.

SYLVESTER:

Okay, which is what? Conflict? Resolution For couples, for couples.

JASMEKA:

Risk management for us. Right. Right For relationships. If I only got $1,000, I may only invest $300 and pay it free up, and then I do a little bit more Right right but let's explain to them what risk management is.

SYLVESTER:

As far as stocks go, smart investors manage risk by setting limits on losses. We talked about the stop loss. That's a part of risk management. Setting limits on your losses Like saying you know what I'm saying? That listen, I ain't going this low when it comes to no man, when it comes to no relationship, right?

JASMEKA:

You ain't taking me to hell, right? We ain't going that far down.

SYLVESTER:

In regard to stock market, diversifying their investments is also risk management. Uh-huh, and understanding market conditions, right. What the market look like. Is it a bear market? Is it a bull market? We just talked about that, right? Is it going up? Is it going down? That is risk management too. Keeping yourself on point as to what it's looking like so that you can know how to move in relationships. Managing conflict in a relationship is similar to managing risk and investments, in a way that couples need strategies. We need strategies to navigate disagreements, to establish boundaries and to protect the health of our relationship. We need resources and strategies. Man.

JASMEKA:

How many courses y'all done been in to learn how to trade? We be investing in them, courses. Are we investing in our relationship? Are we investing in our relationship? Are we investing in our mental health? Are we investing in tools to make this relationship work? Everybody I ain't gonna say everybody, I don't know everybody, but a good number of people invest in courses to how to make money. Do you know that you there's in a power of two? You can double it. What I could have done did by myself having him. I'm getting there a little quicker.

SYLVESTER:

Yes, yes.

JASMEKA:

So it's like don't just look at what I can do for the bag, what we can do for the bag together. So a good stock or a good partner is only as valuable as the investment you put into it. Whatever you put in, that's what you're going to get out.

SYLVESTER:

That's what you're going to get out.

JASMEKA:

Make your investment count, make it count.

SYLVESTER:

I would like to say that you know, when it comes to strategies, we need strategies. So it's like you know what it is that you want out of a relationship. Right, that's the end goal, like you already got, that we start from the end. Right now we go back to the beginning and say, okay, what is it going to take for me to get there? Right, that's the strategy. Right, that's the plan, that's the strategy, that's the goals that you're setting and how we are going to actually get these accomplished. You need strategy for that. You can't just get out there, just talk about, okay, this is what I want and then shoot, I haven't happened to happen.

SYLVESTER:

No, what's your strategy for getting that? What's your strategy for making sure that y'all don't fall out in a year or before a year is up? What's the strategy to make sure that y'all are doing better, better every year, getting closer and more intimate every year? What's the strategy for that? Because it ain't just gonna happen. With time you know I'm saying by default we grow apart, intention, intentionally, though we can get closer and closer. Right, and sometimes it take that fire and it take that that pressure to actually forge us into that, that oneness, that one piece. You know what I'm saying, so let's not despise that. What is it? The bull market? The bear market? Let's not despise the bear market. Sometimes that's good because when you, when you are a seasoned and wise investor, you even know how to profit when it's going down. Wise investor, you even know how to profit when it's going down absolutely, and you know that might be a little bit too much for some of y'all.

JASMEKA:

But uh, the traders, the investors, know what I'm talking about something we share with our kids is I'd rather you hurt them now than hurt them later, like don't stay in a trade or don't stay in a relationship wishing upon a star. I hope this trade make me rich so that I ain't not went all, not went everything on that. On that chart that chart is telling you to exit exit exit.

JASMEKA:

And you just like nah, tomorrow it's going to go up, and tomorrow that thing go down some more. And you just like nah, and in 30 days it's going to go up, and tomorrow that thing go down some more. And you're just like nah, In 30 days it's going to go up, and then some bad news hit and it's going down the whole position.

SYLVESTER:

You'd rather take a small loss than just take a full loss, because you can learn from either loss. But let's, let's, let's just take that little small loss and run with it and get the lesson out of it, and then you still got more that you can invest another day and instead of taking a full loss and now it's gonna take everything in you to recover from this you done lost your house because of this relationship. You done lost your kids. You done lost your mama. You done lost your dog, everything, your car, everything, because you didn't trust the strategies that you put in place. You didn't trust the boundaries that you said. You put in place that things you won't do and will do. You ain't stick to that, for no fundamentals. You got FOMO and the car. You know. They crashed your car and you stayed. And they emptied the bank account and you stayed, and they shot your dog.

SYLVESTER:

All right, All right so so, so, man, you ain't got nothing to even bow back from. You know what I'm saying. So let's, let's, let's, let's. Take it serious, man, what we doing. We out Today's title of this episode is Invest in your Relationship.

JASMEKA:

The thumbnail, then the thumbnail, then the thumbnail. I'm going to give them the title.

SYLVESTER:

Okay.

JASMEKA:

The thumbnail is Stop Loss, stop losing your relationship. Everybody crying he don't love me no more. He don't. I don't Invest the time. Stop loss, we out.

SYLVESTER:

Stop the loss Peace, peace, the time. Stop loss. We out, peace, peace. Welcome to relationships 101 podcast, where we share experiences to help newlyweds and aspiring newlyweds understand the importance of a healthy relationship so that they can thrive in this world called married life.